i have bled so much

i have bled so much

it's a surprise that i'm still alive

i shouldn't be here anymore

undead among the happy living


vitality

seems so obscure to me at this point

i spend my days in a torture chamber

this prison

that is

my depleted body



i have bled so much

i could fill a pool and swim in it

or

like the voice inside is screaming

just give up and slowly sink to the ground



i've been through hell

why go on living when there is only more pain to be expected?

The rock i carry is just getting bigger and bigger

each step feels like disappointment

i won't look you in the eye

i feel so ashamed

after years of suffering

it's time to decide

live or die



live



i have bled so much

and i can bleed so much more

i have found the strength to carry on

by walking a different neuronal pathway

this will change everything




now i'm able to see

the beauty of life again