Do it godess, do it

 Go ahead

give me what i want

but just for a few days

grant me bliss for some moments

then take it away from me again

tear it out of my chest

come on, do it godess

eat me, spit me out

trample me down til nothing is left of me

but a little piece of dirt and suffering

but don't you look at me with pity

i will get through this on my own as i have done for the last five years

and i will not let myself drown again by my vortex of depression

cause i have already lost so much time being powerless

so fuck being powerless and being a slave to my selfdestructive psyche

i am my greatest enemy but also my greatest friend

i choose greatness to be my friend

so pour suffering all over me

drown me, suffocate me, torture me, take everything from me

take my voice, thake my health, take my sanity, take my hope, take everything you want

i will always come back again and again and again and again until the day i die

cause i have only one thought left alive in my mind

like the last man standing clinging to existence

this suffering will make me legendary